Mi Hermano

Tonight I’m staying at my brother’s place. It’s getting fun to spend time with him again. My cousin has moved into his own place, a rented studio in Burbank, after sleeping on Ruben’s couch for three months. Jim has been house-sitting for a friend for the past three weeks. I haven’t seen Todd, his actual roommate for a long time now that he’s in a new relationship. Basically my brother has his entire apartment to himself. Why is it that no matter how much time passes or what’s going on in our day-to-day lives he and I can just relax and be “kids” around each other? I guess no matter how close you become to your friends, the family members whom you are closest with are always going to make you feel your safest. There’s really something to be said about that. I remember the day I moved out of the apartment he and I rented in the Bay Area together. We were in our twenties, I was driving down to LA with my fiancé. This was supposed to be one of the most exciting things I had done with my life at that time, yet I think I cried for the first 30 minutes of the drive thinking about not having my brother around. Seven months later when he came to visit me for my birthday I was so happy to see him. He left the day of the Superbowl. I was supposed to drop him off at the airport then head over to a friend’s house to watch the game. After saying goodbye, I really had to force myself to not just go straight home and be sad by myself. Five months later he moved down and rented a place less than five miles away. That was nine years ago. I really don’t think I’d be as settled in LA for this long if he wasn’t here with me. I have a very full life here on my own as does he, but it just wouldn’t mean as much without him to share it with here. I’m sitting in his living room writing this as he is playing this gory scary PlayStation2 game. Maybe my next self-therapy should be to ponder why I’m writing this about him while he sits eight feet away from me rather than telling him. How strange that he’ll more than likely never know this entry exists.